so... another position just opened up(704) Oh really?(704) Is it John's?(704) Or did you find a new way to take a penis?
i love that we sang a whole new world together while you carried me through campus
I pretty much threw up on him while he slept, I had one task today which was to wash the sheets that I threw up on and I turned them pink. I would leave me if I could
It's like a bag of dicks covered in taint sweat pounding a pregnant baby walrus.
She liked to slap me in the face while she was on top. All I can say is that big boobs can excuse a lot.
I barely remember the girls that I got pregnant, you think I'm gunna remember the ones that played handball
What's a good pandora station to masturbate to?
I feel like I should be doing a victory lap around my house to the rocky music, or zapping and smiting people with my mystic wizard powers
You just kept screaming "COME GET ME OFFICER, MY ALLIGATOR MEANS BUSINESS" while swinging a beanie baby alligator at him.
They had an Olympic theme party at her work yesterday. She brought home her fake gold medal and hung it on my cock after she rode me.
A to Z: fucking your way through the alphabet
It'll be a kids book
He told me to keep watching the Grammys and then went down on me.. I think I'm in love.
Remember how I made that resolution to remain celibate for 6 months? Well, I just broke that
You literally made that 4 hours ago...
april was a good month for me, sexually...doubled my number, had a threesome, fucked a girl for the first time and two different boys in one night. there should be a medal
You aaa... you ever forget to wipe your ass?
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