considering you've had every STD known to man, you think if i sent you a picture of my dick (no homo) you could tell me whats growing on it?
You know your from las vegas when the girl on the stage in the strip club was in my US gov class senior year
i just deleted quailman, hot hawaiian dude, appalachian swimmer, and connecticut from my phone
some dude is stoned out of his mind in my calc class. just shouted that the teacher was a genius cause he got rid of so many numbers
Thanks to her sunglasses tan, I can't look at her when she blows me cause it's like getting blown by a raccoon. A very talented raccoon
I kept trying to give you water and you kept spitting it back at me. You looked like a camel. People were staring
Since i didn't have a condom I told him to use jump ship method, I think I was overly invested in my sailor costume this year.
If I die tonight and was cremated, you could probably get high off the smoke.
I GOT A VENDING MACHINE FOR OUR LIVING ROOM
So nowhere in the dress code does it forbid me from showing up to City Hall in a gorilla suit to meet the mayor.
At a bar across from the city police station. I PROMISE I will do something great.
He's only giving you free adderall so you can focus on his dick.
It's funny when you can't take a fishing boat because you fucked the captains wife
You just sat there staring at your apple and saying "I'm so glad you're here" to it every time you took a bite.
I don't think you could pull off being mean.
How do you think I'm still single?
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