People are allowed to visit it's just they can't be from Germany and have to wear masks.
I just beer bonged a sparks. You better get your ass over here because no one is on my level yet
is wine microwaveable?
she danced around my room naked waving around the gold trojan magnum condoms singing "i have the golden ticket."
little did she know i was taping her the whole time.
when i grow up i'm putting garbage disposals in all showers of my house so when you vomit in the shower its easy clean up
We welcome drunken adversity.
With open legs.
At this point, just throw that mattresses away. Or bronze it and display it as a testament to your shame. either is good.
The guys are trying to figure out my orientation....think theyve settled on "drunksexual"
He's super sweet. I feel like I'm dating Elmo. If Elmo had a 7 incher
Well, I crapped my pants in front of her entire family, was laughed out of their house, and I had to walk home with shit stained pants. So, yeah, it went really well.
I just said "you do you" to my penis.
Well. Another one of my exes came out of the closet.
Rough birthday weekend. Eating McDonalds in the shower and used a fifth of sky as a pillow last night
If I don’t find a quality dick soon I’m going to beg the neighbor for another threesome with her and her husband. It’s like Covid killed all the quality penis Vegas normally has
Apparent my drunk ass was so dedicated to taking a piss, when I walked across the dance floor to get to the bathroom a 9/10 broad tried to dance with me and I just pushed her aside, like hard enough to send her a few feet from where she was standing, pointed at her and said "Not now chief, gotta rock a mean one."
Randomize
