ur penis kinda felt like a vagina to me
im glad we only fight about serious things like the hills and disney scene it
we dont know what were doing after yet. first up we have 90 beers and a party kit and fun hats.
i knew it was time to break up with him once he pulled out the Halo foreplay costumes
I negotiated the purchase of an entire tray of like 50 jello shots for $8.
fuck. I just remembered I agreed to let you finger me last night for solely for "scientific purposes"
Yeah I made some freshmen feed me oddles of noodles and I passed out
So high I started crying because I was proud of Snoop Dogg for becoming Snoop Lion
I think I died last night.
Yeah, you got carried home
if a CSI technician examined our hotel room with a black light he'd think we hit the Pulse button a DNA blender without a lid
You tipped the Uber driver extra for taking your phone away while you were drunk texting
I woke up with the gnarliest cold/hangover combo
Thats what u get when u have butt ass naked rooftop sex at night in december
Worth it.
I woke up to an email from expedia confirming my flight to hong kong
Literally just took 6 shots in the shower..I’ve got this.
Nice people suck dick too. I'm proof.
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