I didn't want to talk to him so I just started telling him how important Jesus was to me
and all i could think about was how mcdonalds would not be open anymore after we were done having sex
Just got Netflix. Dexter Marathon. Still in my PJ's. Only eaten cookie dough and drinking a 40. I have never reeked so strongly of lonely .
I believe I convinced two girls to makeout for freedom last night Hahaha
I gave up. I'm crying over my notes. Oh, ya know, just another drunk finals week
I'm a wonderful, drunk angel of hydration and sometimes absinthe.
He was literally going down on me and giving me a foot rub AT THE SAME TIME. What more can I ask for?
We watched game of thrones, broke up and I drove away blasting ridin solo while he dougied
sometimes, you gotta take him by the hands like tails took sonic, and fly him into the bedroom.
he was like captain planet, but less blue and more nakeed
Who knew that the guy I fucked on your front lawn during welcome week freshman year would turn out to be my husband
It's just unfortunate that I still have the image of him having sex with me fresh in my mind
If he refers to me as slump buster one more fucking time.
Does going to a local bar count as taking part in Small Business Saturday? Asking for a friend
I'm good. But Nutella doesn't taste as good as it used to.
Randomize
