She actually asked me 'is it in yet?' I deleted the vid.
turn left when you see the girl thats puking on the sidewalk. she hasnt been moving much so she makes a good street marker
it took you forty minutes to realize it was a gay bar.
im honestly just eating salsa and looking at his penis
You drunk invited us to do an intervention for you.
I think I broke a hole in her wall trying to do backflips
I deem her datable let the dance of attraction commence
dont iron anything. we fucked on the ironing board. details to follow.
He wanted me to strip for him. I told him that we aren't at that serious of a fuck buddy relationship yet
He said you asked to eat pepperoni off his dick and he thought it was weird
I mean I thought it sounded fun
lets start a news segment called WHY IS LEOS CROTCH BURNING TODAY
Walking into my bedroom & smelling stale sex & disappointment isn't how I envisioned being 39, in case you were wondering.
Eh, I don't question what my penis likes. It just does what it does.
Made out with some dude at the bar last night. Was fun until he thought bohemian rhapsody was by The Who
Next time I say "i forgot to eat dinner, oh well" before drinking STRAP ME TO A CHAIR AND FORCE FEED ME BEFORE ALLOWING ME TO CONSUME BOOZE
Randomize
