i have a new swear word: supercalifuckaliciousexpialadamnit
and then she said I drew a line on her forehead with my cum and whispered "Simba"
It's always exciting to touch a new boob.
She acts like you when your on meds
She acts like batman?
her name was charlotte except you kept calling her chatroulette and yelling at her to show you her boobs
She looked at me and said there is a 90% chance I am going to puke in the next 10 minutes. 10 minutes later she is in jack in the box throwing up. She has amazing timing.
He told the cop he was underage, handed the cop his ID, and the police report read "I then informed the suspect that he was not, in fact, underage"
I like yr title more along "the hot Russian I have sex with."
As i was blowing him Silent Night came on his iTunes. I said "it isn't christmas" and he moans "yeah it is."
Do what your heart wants. . .
My heart wants to rip his balls off and tie therm to his head using his penis
Are you stuck outside of your house because you forgot to walk up stairs? Cuz I've been there.
Best feedback on my performance so far: "There are things that can't be unseen."
I'm in public and Taylor Swift is playing. It is taking all my effort to not screech like a goat.
You just want me for my pizza coupons and my penis.
I don't just want drugs. I deserve drugs.
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