after everytime she pucked, she insisted on us all giving her high fives
The streak lives on, still havent been to Towson without throwing up
Tell your boyfriend I'm sorry for ruining his vein. I'm never drawing blood drunk again.
No, I'm in the bathroom trying to scrub off the 16 tally marks on my wrist so its not so obviously to the world that I puked on a couch last night.
When you accidentally type "I want Prince William to fuck me in the ass" to your mom there's really no way to take that back.
Breakfast tacos?
YOU ARE A FOUNTAIN OF GREAT IDEAS
We were eating hotdog buns dipped in French onion dip in lawn chairs at 4am. That drunk
She almost killed me. The shot she handed me had tacks in it. Wtf?!
it doesn't matter, he's just a life support system for his dick
I can already see the regret in her eyes. Amazing night. This city rules.
we're going to the olympic park to run the 100m yeaaaahhh
it's 3am. Nothing could possibly go wrong here.
I found a video on my phone from last night... You got up on the table at McDonald's and screamed BURRITOOO!
tbh I think I just dated him for his dogs in the first place.
What?? I could've slept with an ordained minister!
Idk but when you think about it the last time I did bottomless mimosas I ended up getting my nipples pierced so it might be fair
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