Im watching someone hooking up in the library
procrastination at its finest
we were fucking and all I could think about is how my silly bands were glowing in the dark.
Just hooked up on shake weight girl's dad's porsche. What are YOU doing with your life?
He added me on Facebook. I'm pretty sure he got my name from the inside of the bra I had lost in the frat house.
you're like that jamaican tarat card reading chick... only with herpes
DRUNK CANOEING
Please text me if you survive.
LAND HO BITCH
Aside from the fact that im drinking wine straight from the bottle to save doing dishes, im also standing in front of the oven to save turning on the heater. its gonna be a rough winter.
I just debated creating a mirror system so I could play Batman while in the bathroom. I think I need help.
I already knew that. But I also don't agree with stifling creativity.
If 26 stitches didn't sober her up, nothing will.
The shit I just took made me regret every life decision leading up to it.
The woman in the flower onesie is claiming she hasn't been drinking.
i'm sitting in bed scratching my boobs and wearing a sparkly fedora and have no one to blame but myself
Nice classy night out before we roll our faces off
It smells like graded cheese and febreze in the family room what the hell have you been up to???
Guess who cheated on their SATs? Also on the same line guess who's getting in to Princeton at damn near free of charge?
Randomize
