Brandon just fucked that chick! I tried to warn him but T9 said she had "puppy roses" instead of "pussy sores"
the level of his annoyance + every insult he makes = the closer I am to telling him im fucking his ex
If you're going to watch porn, can you atleast be considerate and watch it on my old laptop and not the new one?
And then he asked the cop "shall i shut off the lady gaga?" as he was being frisked.
It's my fault there's ramen coiled around his penis.
Found crayons in my cigarette pack. I can't help but feel you may be responcible.
You dislocated his arm and then bought him two shots to numb the pain while you pushed it back in
After you vomited on the patrol car, you thanked the officer for helping you up off the ground. I don't think you realized you were being arrested.
That place is a DUI and an STD waiting to happen. I think I'll pass.
I send out my deepest condolences for seeing my ass last night.
It's because of weed that I don't mind driving an hour to visit my family. And it's because of you that there's weed in my life. Thank you.
If pulling your dick out counts as a hobby that is his.
My brother is so high right now he's eating frozen peas and called them "fucking delightful"
I'm not gonna lie. I need sex like plants need water right now. I just need the dick.
Thank god you don't know my other address I'm safe for now
Awww you know you would like it if I found u
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