hot ketchup is not a substitute for marinara
Packing for the trip... do they take Visa in South Dakota?
A guy at the bar bought me a jag bomb because I'm the chick that frosts his donuts at KT. Never have I been more proud of being a failure at life.
Did we fight the bathroom girl ? She just wanted to give us lotion and condoms.
do you remember the combo for the lock to my pants?
We still going to Happy Hour
Idk. I can't because it doesn't fit in my schedule of sleeping or throwing up
When did it become appropriate to call your mother the morning after? While still naked in bed? WHEN?!
I'm really glad that we can be casual hook up buddies. This is a true friendship. Now, please convince your roommate to do the same. Thanks.
As long as you keep bringing fries home, i'll keep being naked when you get home
I still can't believe that dog licked my nipple.
I got horny for like a second but the eggplant snapped me out of it
I haven't answered because I haven't figured out a polite way of saying fuck no
I am such a fucking liability at weddings. I ended up making out with this married 40-year-old that told me that basically if I came home with him and be a sex partner for him and his wife, I would never have to pay for anything again. Extremely considered it.
Everything isn’t always sunshine & rainbows. Sometimes there’s tequila.
My vagina cried when he left. I think she's about to be at war with my self respect.
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