Best walk of shame ever - Brown Hennesy shirt, bright blue overly large basketball shorts, stilettos from night before - ended up buying a ton of 40's and a 30 pack of coors.
Where are you?
A place I should not be.
My itunes is telling me i listened to toxic by b spears 108 times last night
I don't plan to be alive for 2010 so ima say this 12 hours early. Happy New Year bitches
How do I recover from singing "your body is a wonderland" on his voicemail?
Shark Week. Kick off begins Sunday. The drinking game has been upgraded to include jumping/breaching sharks and Jake's not allowed to bring the harpoon. Period.
everybody makes mistakes
i didn't know they allowed you to text in ambulances
You chanted SOFA PIZZA all night then we woke up to find about ten slices under the cushions where you were sleeping....
Have the decency to NOT HANG YOU'RE USED CONDOM ON THE FOOSEBALL HANDLES! Dickhead.
Fair enough. Everyone has some guilty pleasures. Yours is yourself
I hoped the great care he put into rolling a blunt would translate to my vagina.
Yes. I masterbate to Harry Potter. It's what our generation does.
I think it's important to not involve Bar Food in any near future decisions.
The single life is the freaking dream dude. I'm sitting here naked, eating chocolate mousse, and watching Gilmore girls. It's wonderful
I am sweating Crown. It all went wrong when the ratio hit 50-50
I also guarantee you multiple orgasams and blueberry pancakes
Randomize
