Apparently they shut down a cook out cause people were selling drugsout the drive thru. Nice to be home
she looked like the before picture.
i just cleaned out my toilet because i knew that my head would be in it later
Got bored today and made list of places in apt I want to have sex. One includes opening and coming out the window.
If I die, please delete the word file entitled "Rainy Day"
I'll trade you a raw potato for some vodka
i think a pirate just stole the rest of our fucking beer. what an appropriate costume.
I remember saying "sorry" to the blunt before throwing it out the window
The stripper told me she had been working there for eight years, then got mad when I asked if she was trying to make it into mangment. Awkwardest lap dance
I was literally just a half conscious dildo.
Yea my vagina was pretty pissed at me for not taking advantage of the situation...
I'm ultimately at thr Shariton to drink and ppssibly puke on fancy shit. Thats my story and Im sticking to it.
He just took a bite of each taco bell burrito and hid them throughout my apartment. this was 2 weeks ago and have found 30 burritos so far
I just folded my boss's lingerie. I need a drink and a raise
I just walked past a guy banging a chick in the back of his car.
Just watched a girl lose her dignity at the corner...it's not even midnight
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