K, im just throwing this out there, i am not making out with any of his friends... Especially the cross eyed one.
Wtf. Who made this Big Mac, Helen Keller?
and when he finished he started shouting "swim boys SWIM"
the whole city is out of plan b pills. this is the meanest game of musical chairs ever.
Drunk. Just jacked off for the third time in an hour. I love not being Catholic anymore.
Do you have any idea how hard it is to cum to Chingy?!
Carson when you get home I want you to go downstairs and go into each bedroom and pick up the underwear and either throw it out or give it back to the people who own them. Look all over the room. Thank, Love Mom
What's the mantra for Sunday?
I will not have sex with him.
Discovery: bouncers seem to get really upset about fire
Do you think they'll deliver pizza to my mouth
Which is worse that I came in public or that no one noticed?
She has the best kind of daddy issues
He took my Spanx off and still fucked me twice. I call that success.
There were 16 girls and 31 titties. That’s how the club was. Lance doesn’t get to decide ever again.
My vagina! What have you done to it?
Blessed it my child.
Randomize
