how in the hell can u get pulled over when ur car is parked.
She had her laptop open and there was microsoft word opend and all was written was "no italianoo"
And the best part is I don't remember putting the condom in my pocket! Angels officially exist
Im in the bathtub drunk. Less than an hour before the interview. This will be the best or worst career move ever., support?
There's a really old guy here with a really young girl. I'm guessing he has to make choo choo train noises to get his dick in her mouth.
I wanna throw up and cum in that order
I just found a 2 minute video on my phone of you throwing up in a fake plant.
Makers Mark. Chicken nuggets in a blender. Smart
If 26 stitches didn't sober her up, nothing will.
Dude, on the way home the cab driver asked why you didn't bring a guy home and referred to you as "one night stand girl"
Alive.
So much puke
Neither a grow-er nor a show-er. More like a no-er. If he didn't have testicles, I'm not sure you could tell he was a male, even standing there naked. There will be no second date.
On a scale from 1-10 how wrong is it to request "I Hit It First" at my ex's wedding reception?
Definite 12.2 but worth it.
How many hotdogs are you going to eat today?
THE LIMIT DOES NOT EXIST
I currently don't understand fingers.
Randomize
