they have a walk of shame score keeper on their fridge. I marked my tally for him on my way out..
she passed out facedown in my lap while I was playing piano. 11 years of piano lessons finally paid for themselves.
I searched the house and found a small bottle of sherry which is probably as old as I am, has prob gone off and tastes like shit. I don't care any more. It has come to this.
Chelsea passed out in the kiddie pool. Just added around 28 boxes of jello powder. Will let you know how it works out
BTW, it's bullshit to say that not doing a shot is unpatriotic. You know how I fall for that.
Remember...the emancipation proclimation is your favorite document, you love asian women, japanese food is the tits, and you willfully employ as many latinos as possible...
Im 95% ready to shit behind 711
Someday. I cant very well invite myself to his dorm room. And I'm 28. The excuses to be drunk and running into him at uconn are rather slim. Although I'm working on it.
Being home sucks. I haven't drank in like a week. Or smoked cigs. Or done drugs. Or had sex. My body is shutting down.
Omg. It's like you're one of those deprived kids living in a third world country. We need to save you.
I can't ever date him again. Whenever I see his face I just remember helplessly pissing myself in my car.
Me hangover (as projected). That sounds like a plan. Ill do it for Mexico
Ok because I want to set a new world record for how fast I can drink away my Christmas money
Why did the sexual harassment class show a clip from frozen?
How I know I've been single too long: I'm reveling in finding out my taken friends are being tragically dumped
momentary stint on a second floor library computer...guy next to me snorted blue adderall off his notebook through a cut straw, i cant tell if this guy is my hero or just plain crazy...
Randomize
