oh well we may not be friends on facebook but at least i got laid
We had sex in his tahoe, talked about how we don't love each other and then high fived twice. Best Day Ever
the owner gave me a free bottle of vodka and a 12pack of red bull if i agreed to leave. my drunken antics are finally paying off.
Nothing on google about my condom issue. However, if you get a chance google: condom with teeth.
Girl passed out in class and vomited. Another victim of syllabus week
Am I undercharging for one hour of sex per essay? I need a serious business answer.
Last night: Repeatedly yelled about how the fishbowl tasted like blue, stole a stranger's hat, hugged the DJ for playing my request, made out with my roommate, and abandoned the guy I dragged to the club in the first place
This morning: Hat doesn't fit, hangover headache is blue, and I can't move without getting lightheaded
Listen when they tell you not to drink after giving blood
For future reference, Twizzlers CAN leave welts.
Thank god Shes going home for winter break, gives my dick a chance to recover from those "bjs." Youd think a senior could suck a dick by now.
It was like the Alcoholic Olympics...double fisting fifths with eight 40s in my backpack...running from the cops in stilettos. I will have bitchin' hamstrings come Monday.
i ordered 6 shots "to go" what did you think was going to happen!
My legs have surpassed "hairy" and entered the territory of "furry". Maybe I should just suck it up and shave already
No now I'm curious!
The object of the game was to pour tequila into a sombrero and drink as much as you can before it leaked through, 'Big Papi' won.
And Mike keeps telling Will that love at first sight is true and this is just a shit show. Help.
My debit card was between my ass cheeks when i woke up. i vaguely remember putting it there for safe keeping
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