what time did you get home last night?
SO late...when your in the lap of a 35 year old superstar you loose track of time
He said to me " i could be your father but i dont care"...it was so hott
you made me "pop lock and drop it" as a sobriety test last night..
corn on the cob and anal lube are not substitutes for the real thing
That's why there are breakfast margaritas.
Also, last night I had a dream that I was in a victoria's secret fashion show and they made me wear a t-shirt over my lingerie. Spring dieting begins now.
I said I usually like going out for coffee before torturing someone's genitals. He said he understood.
Just successfully went through airport security with shrooms. It's gonna be a fucking awesome new years
Ed's in which sucks about a thousand cocks... But thats 1800 less than working with Alex so it's gonna be a good day
I keep confusing the name of her and her dog. Both are appropriate.
The fuck-me-pumps were hot, the XL hoody kinda ruined it.
Happy 420. I woke up to a girl smoking weed and dragging me out of bed. Chemistry makes so much sense high.
I feel like I'm going to shit out a Big Mac
It was only in the sobering silence of the wilderness on the mountain, after I was too tired to talk anymore and I also didn't want to tell Julian that we were lost, that I realized how super tripped out I had been the entire time...
I met a gypsy today. She told me my soul animal was an owl and says she will now remember me as "Owl Girl".
I have a burn on my hand, I'm covered in bruises, I think my toe is broken, and I have no clothes to wear home.
Randomize
