i just drank a strangers drink off a toilet
Just found a copy of intimate toy times in my mom's trash can...
the people next to us in line are buying a 12 pack and a snuggie
His little brother walked in on us. Six times.
I told you not to have sex with her on my futon
I didnt dude, i swear!
either that or you were eating mayo, which was the second thing i told you not to do on my futon
I fucked my boyfriend 15 minutes before my pap test. My gyno probably thinks I hate her.
don't worry about it. We passed around the "get jeff bail" can 10 min. After you left. We currently have around $400. May I say that people here at the dorms really love you.
Im down. Even tho your nick name intimidates my vagina.
Are you still crying. What are you doing. Have 10 shots of tequila.
I'm just crazy horny about you
Remember when you fed me goldfish while I was -inside- of someone?
Come help me clean and have sexual intercourse with me
Bring breadsticks
I just realized I have a habit of pre gaming for therapy visits. Problem?
We'll discuss it when you get here
I feel fine lol. I tried climbing a tree but the branch broke and I got arrested.
He ate me out in a limo while we were driving home. I love bars being open again!
Randomize