sooooo how many boyfriends is too many?
Considering last night's endeavors, I am going to hell 5 times over. 1 for puking on a hobo, 1 for laughing about it, and 3 for remembering it today and laughing about it sober
she wants me to meet her parents and she hasn't even met my penis yet.
Nah you can have him. There's too many men in my life right now. I can't handle another dick.
We all know tonight is going to end like every other night with you. drunk, pantless and confused. Dont try to switch things up.
i love that youre following in my footsteps.. pissing yourself on your birthday is an honor and a privlege
You sir are most definitely in. Better get your penis an umbrella as that bad boy is gonna get soakkkkkkeddddd.
Although I am concerned about who made the decision to let you loose in a bridal show I am proud to see you in a sombero again.
I want to go out and have good clean fun.
Ok, but that does not include Bud Light Platinum and your vagina.
he stopped talking to me, quit his job, moved out of the province and then told me it was "no big" when I called him apologizing...
Dude, you vomitted into a trashcan wearing your bear hands and high heels. Your drug dealer even said that was rough.
There are many penises to be discovered and claimed tonight
We're like Lewis and Clark
And he's in a frat. Everyone in a frat is gay. It's science.
Sooo i'm debating posing nude for the drawing and painting classes, I just wanna see if they draw my nip ring.
I'M SO HIGH I FORGOT HOW TO EAT A STRAWBERRY. A FUCKING STRAWBERRY.
Randomize
