You're boyfriend is farting in his sleep. The last one sounded like a threat.
he said he wished he had more hands so he could firmly hold my boobs.
I think they should rename 16 and pregnant to "I was fucked in highschool and all I got was a baby and humiliated infront of the nation on MTV"
Come home. Power Hour by yourself is only fun for the first 10 minutes.
I heard from multiple reliable sources that she doesn't have a gag reflex. Of course I'm going to try to go home with her.
he somehow instantly knew i was from vermont.
it probably had something to do with chasing your soco with maply syrup.
I don't think the cop knew you were on ecstasy until you asked for a back rub.
Shoot me. Guy hitting on me with a beaver on his head. Says it is his spirit animal.
I thanked her dad for "firing off a good one" when she was conceived. She said thats why he doesnt like me.
I got a dollar bill stuffed into my bra on two separate occasions by two separate guys simply for having boobs. I feel like somewhere god is patting himself on te back while pointing at me goin "you're welcome dude." easiest two bucks I ever made.
Boobs speak an international language.
My heart says buy the granny panties, but my vagina says don't throw in the towel yet.
Not all of us can be into hot dads. Some of us have to have commitment issues and be into musicians.
At one point did I say I have a doctorate in fuck u?
It was platonic naked porno viewing, I swear.
Randomize
