What do you think that old couple was thinking when they saw me puking in the QT parking lot at ten in the morning?
the chair was smiling at me in sociology and i had to try not to burst out laughing.
Well, I'm a guy so I don't have one, but if its anything like the inside of my nose, yes, vodka would burn.
All I've accomplished this quarter is making Uno an acceptable drinking game.
Wow... that's disturbing man, and their not even my balls
I'm not a creep or anything, just a lost soul looking for a good lay
I can't right now...you know Sunday night is whn I get drunk and do laundry.
She had her underwear around her neck. No one can tell me i'm a slut now.
Under no circumstances is it ok to do naked cartwheels in front of anyone. i don't care how much ecstasy you took
She's dressed as a slutty goth schoolgirl. Those are my three favorite things. God himself could not give me whiskey dick.
his brother walked in while we were fucking on the couch, told me i had "lovely jugs" and offered to make both of us a drink
If they were bad they leave that night, if they were good they get a gold star, and if they were great they get invited back. Simple.
I let a 30 year old guitar player that works at a call center go down on me in his backseat last night
She actually made an event on facebook for tomorrow when she does a pregnancy test, 8 people are attenting so far
My son's girlfriend just thanked me for having good penis genes.
Randomize
