I sk at the spereo and my dad gave me and all access pass
what???
AN ALL ACCESS PASSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS
It's an Italian thing I guess, grew up on that shit.
I'm Irish, we don't eat cow guts unless they're blended into a fine whiskey
you wanted the guy to gift wrap the condoms
he made a bald eagle out of coke lines
I'm crying, drinking alone and applying for jobs tonight. I figure the alcohol will lower my job standards.
Although, I did get to see a Raiders fan and his toothless girlfriend get roughed up by the police and dragged out of the stadium. So the night wasn't a total loss.
I don't remember much, but my night is dated pre-Jaeger and post-Jaeger. Also, my boss may or may not have tucked me in.
You may or may not of thrown up on your shoes, and you tried to give me a wet willy in my eye.
Just found out I own a pyramid. Fuck your good grades, I'm living in my pyramid.
I ate 12 cupcakes in less than 24 hours, so no judgement here.
Yes... I'll kill two birds with one crazy ecstacy filled night.
it's like his dick is making a u-turn.
Seriously I can't get a booty call for some baked goods.
Decided to stop by the store on my walk of shame. I must really look like shit, a six year old girl just walked up to me and said "my mommy wanted me to tell you Jesus loves you." Thanks kid.
Don't try to butter me sideways
That is without a doubt the most Southern thing you have ever said.
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