I got wasted for the 1st time and I sat in a fridge for 2 hours and a trash can?
I guess what I'm trying to say is you've fucked more people than the economy.
just put cider in my bong. gotta love fall
He kept saying the best defense against a lion is to punch it in the throat.
she made me put on a condom before giving me a handjob...this is why i hate freshmen
Apparently one comment in my womens studies class cockblocks yourself for an entire semester.
There are beer cans & oyster shells along the side of the road. I belong here
I may have to steal the boat sober, but I feel that would be harder to explain.
I just read "to infinity and beyond" as "to infidelity and beyond" something is seriously wrong with my psyche
I definitely think you should enjoy one last spring break being a sorostitute before you get serious and settle down with price charming. I mean hes not going to be there any way. he can wait a week.
His life is a porno. He snapped me while banging a girl in the back of the ambulance.
I feel like my foot is being amputated. Or maybe it's the vodka. I couldn't tell you.
We did blind alcohol taste testing and she got 10 of 10. I'm in love.
Booze, boobs, blunts and batman. dude, I'm livin' the life.
I think I fell asleep on my pizza last night. Damn, I am sauccccy.
Randomize
