So yes it WAS her period, NOT a nose bleed.
direct quote: "i'm so over my clit" either best or most awkward conversation possible with your COUSIN
You know I'm really starting to enjoy being everyones first gay experience
thats the mark of a good guy. when you can period all over his leg and he still thinks you're beautiful!
okay I may or may not have wrapped my body pillow up in your t-shirt and sprayed it with your axe and am now spooning with it.
again? I'm starting to get a little creeped out now.
why is pumping your own stomach in your searches on youtube?
its barely noon and he already threw up and i have second degree burn
I don't know at least half of his name. I have officially become a statistic.
the bar just sent me a facebook message congratulating me on being a regular and getting such good grades. my life is not real.
I'm going to replace you with a friend who will be happy when I find a huge penis
idk. a stripper just bit me. I'm so disoriented
I met her parents last night. Her dad smelled like weed and kept yelling "I HAVE ALLERGIES AHHH MY EYES ARE BURNING!" During dinner It had to be good weed he didn't even know he was yelling.
These are the last few fleeting sober moments of the day for me. If there is anything you need me to do today, please tell me now
I didn't even know his name until he texted me the next day and told me I should take a plan B pill. Thanks Danny.
Success! We fucked roommates!
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