one more question, do you know why i woke up with 5 pounds of quarters, nickels and dimes in my pocket?
A lady just asked me if you "seat yourselves" here at qdoba. I told her yea and she has been sitting at a table waiting for someone to take her order for 25 mins.
We tried to play doctor all sexually then he was taking down my 'symptoms' I said I needed to puke he thought it was part of the game
Seriously, let me lead the intervention, my parents did like three with me. I know how it works.
Also I smoked away my sore throat last night. It's a 420 miracle.
it will be an insanely irresponsible summer.the only things i plan on not doing are dying and getting pregnant.and even those are negotiable
He came when Ron Burgundy started playing the jazz flute. How do you think it went?
I have no idea. But I feel like I could climb a mountain and then have sex on it.
While he was gone for spring break I took his head board... I don't wanna wake up from his shenanigans for the rest of my college career.
I'm just chillin on the bathroom floor
Haha oh no
The bathroom floor is like my second bedroom on the weekends
Next think I knew I was pretty much using his penis as a microphone... No more playing Eminem during hookups
Thanks for bringing me tea/a bucket. You have earned yourself a face touch.
IF I CANT STRIP TO SANTA BABY THEN WHY EVEN HAVE CHRISTMAS.
How does one acquire holy water?
So then I got so stoned I sat and took my pulse for 10 minutes.
Randomize
