If she sucks any more cock I swear she will be a spermivore
My brother and I both agreed that your boobs are fake.
it's just like freshman year of high school, with more drugs
Ps if we're still living vicariously through each other, you had sex on a beach last night
man, work is way more interesting with these acid flashbacks.
I'm gonna wear that dress that makes me look like a slut. You know, the one your sister got arrested in.
Uggh answer your phone, you are the only one I know who'll be proud of what I woke up next to this morning .
What do you think french fries on pizza would taste like?
i already know. Delicious. Use ranch.
Most adult booty call ever. Ha. We got down to business and still got to watch the colbert report.
High Amy loves you. Sober Amy is unsure, but she's not here so fuck that bitch.
Starting the weekend with a pair of pants on which the zipper wont stay up. Is this a sign of things to come??
just saw a kid get pissed on buy a tiger at the zoo. His dad is rofling and the kid is crying. I think I have to go make a new friend
Also I’m on 3%. Just Incase.. I miss you and I love you and you’re my everything and I’m getting drunk.
Let's just say when I woke up I was still drunk. My hangover hit me around noon so I chilled w my dad and took a bath and shower at the same time. You just can't do that at college
How much have you had to drink?
Qhaghao Oslo?
That seems like quite a lot.
Randomize
