Have fun with your cool freestyling girlfriend!
She can rap better than you any day
Maybe I lied like you did about your herpes.
blowing a .13 at 10 AM isn't nearly as cool as I thought it would be.
Dude i thought about you literally the second after I came. This friendship is starting to cross some serious boundaries
I have your dog in a headlock. Se wants my mushrooms.
Was just walking through the park by the river. Saw some random in a tree, we climbed up, blazed with him and bought a bag. In the tree. Real shit.
I need to stop going to bars and yelling "I could be teaching your kids one day, bitches!"
Haha! I've never met his girlfriend, so my main focus will be not saying,"you're the only person in this room that doesn't know what my vagina feels like."
we played a my little pint drinking game. It was awesome.
At the ER, will you come pick me up... Had an allergic reaction, wanted to see if I could eat a peanut without dying... Do you how bad this is evolutionary, I would have died back in the days of survival of the fitest by now
I can't believe I ever hated her sister or friends. They got her some sexy sexy ass lingerie for the honeymoon. I think I love them bitches
Made it just outside my dorm and yack on the front dirt. Wave to a dad thats staring, continue on my way.
Just used the handle end of a spatula to get the baggie of coke wedged between my passenger seat. Innovation points?
Can I get my morals surgically removed?
There's wax on my nightstand, my sheets look like Christmas, and my vagina feels like it got into a fight. All signs of a good night
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