What's the politest way to tell someone that you're only interested in them when they're naked, and even then it's just like a passing "meh?"
his receeding hairline makes running into him so much less awkward. almost enjoyable actualy
I just remember getting him back by licking the window on his truck.
Don't tell me wow. Tell me this is normal for college and in no way am I a whore.
I didn't realize I was holding it, until I was like, "whose baby is this?"
I could write a book on how to barely get by in community college. I just took an online quiz on my phone, at the bar, 6 minutes before it was due.
I swear, he has the body awareness of an acid-tripping quadriplegic.
the fact that i already established a hook up buddy for thanksgiving break is genius
Doesn't matter how many times we tell him the kid's a freshman, he keeps repeating "cupcake boy shall be mine" and honestly you need to intervene
Lets get drunk and then you just wraps me into a present because that sounds like fun after the past 3 glasses of wine I drank
I woke up on a boat next to an extremely attractive man wearing nothing but a life jacket. Neither one of us owns a boat...
I can recall having this conversation with a three year old, but go on
Nobody wants to date "Eats Taco Bell Secretly In Her Car" Girl
I've had your balls on my face a bunch of times so the least you could do is buy a girl some dinner.
I wanna suck that fisherman's dick.
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