When you only buy popcorn and condoms at the grocery store they know whats up.
i wanna do a homemade sex video in sepia and pretend were in the early 20th c
I just hope my dad was drunk enough to not remember the whole convo we had about anal.
I just woke up in the back of his van. Bring me a sunkist.
Booyah. Found 8000 pesos in my closet and that's apparently 608 US dollars
about to get into a hot tub with three cops. this cant go well
Dude, we took our shirts off and set our chest hair on fire. That's a low point.
You raise a valid concern
oh yea it is. i was not expecting to look at a snowbank and just see flying mushrooms
Telling me that I would make a great "occasional fuck" was not appreciated.
yea im pretty sure it has something do with my love of forearms...
That's fun. I just masturbated and I swear my vagina creaked.
Everybody shut up a minute, we need to discuss how much nicer the world would be if pants weren't a thing.
all we have is white fucking wine this is a travesty it's christmas not a fucking funeral
She was doing hand motions and used straws from drinks like those airport light batons to have me back my "747 jumbo dick" towards you.
sober me thinks like you do. drunk me needs sober me's advice. am i allowed to go to his house?
Randomize
