it was a shit show
We all have our days. But yours might be on the internet.
its not stalking. its research.
I hit 10,000 texts this month.. I think my grandkids have carpal tunnel.
Your excuse of not making us Mac and cheese was that you couldn't find 6 cups of water...
riding the spinning bikes at the rec after Valentines Day was a baaddddd idea
Ok, maybe I don't want to know what happened last night... But somehow I guess I moved the oven.
She had her underwear around her neck. No one can tell me i'm a slut now.
After he came, I wiped my mouth on my baby blanket. I could feel nana rolling over in her grave.
Halloween is the end of the singles holidays they don't start again until st. Patrick's day we better get wifed up or it's going to be a long winter lol
i know it looks like there's pee in the mayo jar in the fridge but i promise it's just apple juice that wouldn't fit in the jug after i added the booze.
I'm sitting here with a heating pad and a fan on me eating snow caps off of my boobs
I wouldn't be able to live with myself if I blew a Trump supporter.
you tried to drunkinly do the backflip kick off of karate kid and broke the big screen
Drunk sex on a hardwood floor is never ever a good idea. Lesson learned.
You’ll (maybe) appreciate that I picked at my ingrown hair again. Quarantine updates are getting BLEAK.
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