What is the pluralization of human? I just got humen rejected, and I am going completely blank...
I thought I hit my peak drinking in college. Just finished first day on Wall Street. College was nothing.
i wish it would rain vodka just once. i have not puked yet bring it on
Correct me if I'm wrong, but did you let me pee in the grass while barking? And also, how many of you have videos?
I feel like they've probably fucked. Like.. you don't just bring a bitch a Big Mac if you haven't fucked her.
I still don't know his name but his ass is spectacular. Like he should never wear pants.
There's a girl passed out on the sidewalk at the parade. Its not even 10am. She gave candy to children saying it was ketchup. Still think I have a problem?
I maxed out my credit card last night on powdered donuts and beef jerky
Just had my butthole waxed. If that changes your plans for Saturday..
But I am still fully ok with my life choices as long as the consequences aren't onesies and pacifiers
Sexting just isn't as much fun once you learn how bad he is in bed...
Just googled myself and a bunch of boob shots of me came up. Apparently my phone automatically uploaded them to my google plus.
Please google me ASAP and ensure I corrected this...
Oh yeah, it was definitely the best sex of my life, I just don't think I can fix the kitchen table before my parents get back...
I never thought I'd end up with a prison pen pal through tinder
i ate pretzels. i might be the first human to be hospitalized from pretzels. that's how bad this is.
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