Remember, sex is not sex til both people cross the finish line. Until then, it is just a favor.
you were licking his little sister's watercolors and trying to paint with your tongue.
When i look at that picture of him, i'm a little proud to be like yeah, his dick was in my mouth saturday no big deal.
nothing says new school year like ambulances and police road blocks.
Look what our sorority has done to us...we're hitting on girls in hopes of getting an awesome little.
Just gave some kid head in the library. Perfect way to end the semester.
Chasing shots by shotgunning beers is not a good idea.
I just got peed on. This karma circle is starting to get vicious.
By the way, I'm pretty sure your husband is publicly advocating more BJs for my husband, via Facebook.
I just need like a magic vacuum to suck everything out of me and then an IV to put good stuff back in
Colombian exchange intern from my Mom's friend's ranch loves me, and is staying the night because we got each other drunk. Successful Christmas? I think yes.
You haven't demanded nudes today. You alright?
I am one with the molecules
This toilet bowl is my home.
The best thing about last night is when drunk Lauren asked cop if she could smoke a joint in front of him. And next thing I remember she’s smoking weed with a cop. How awesome is that.
Randomize
