there is this woman at the counter who looks identical to linda ellerbee. and she's grinning. COME. INSIDE. NOW.
I guess i tried to text 911 last night with "someone stole my bong." Thank god that doesn't work...
Me and my dog bond so much when im high.
he just quoted gucci mane to try and get me to give him head.
He said they were doing a skit in class apparently someone else is dressed like a horse. Ive never felt more proned to skipping class than now
Sex should be hot, sweaty, messy, and a little painful. At no point should it involve tiny rocks
The only thing i was looking forward to on 4th of july was the google logo and they let me down. That and beer, lots and lots of beer
he aimed his bare ass at the sparkler, farted, and it really did work...i love 4th of july anal fire works
He called me while he was having sex and asked if I wanted to go get mcdonalds
I like the odds of his and my children being professional athletes too. To support me in my old age, see I do think about the future.
In conversation she brought up that she slept with Tucker Max on the UF football field
It turns out my English teacher used to pose for Playboy. She's an inspiration.
I have no clue how you survived last night but I applaud you. 21 body shots off 9 bodies in under four hours has to be a record.
i did these weird ass ab exercises once that left me queefing for weeks
Ps can u get with my cousin? He's a freshman at uconn and he's very attractive but like were related....
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