Pre-pickelized cucumber-hand invasion!! RUN!!!!!!!!!!
I think he was having a seizure but nobody knew because 'what is love' was playing
I want a gay best friend. or apple sauce either one is fine with me
I'm one shot of soco 100 away from fucking a mailbox
when she started singing "you look better when im drunk" to my cat i realized it was time to take her home
No... No really he actually thought the condom was meant for his hand...
That's unfortunate. Distance can be a stoner's greatest enemy.
You make it sound like a battle for Middle Earth.
walk of shame this morning involved walking through the in-home daycare that she runs while it was full of kids. judgemental little shits. on a plus, got a juice box and a graham cracker for the walk home.
He called it restless penis syndrome. I call it cheating.
so i ran into nick. i may be more gay than anticipated
We need to make tonight low-budget
Is this your way of suggesting flasks?
I can't believe you cupped pat's balls to prove your fake relationship
I dont remember you getting a condom thrown at you. I think I had a concusion
HIDE THE INFLATABLE PENIS
He’s perfect! He listens to Genesis during sex and has a VW bus!
You really are from the panhandle, aren’t you?
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