She punched me in the face after i pulled it out and grabbed my cell phone. Ill be the one hiding in the bushes with one shoe.
it sucked. he totally couldn't get it up. blamed it on never having cheated b4. Couldn't stop laughing. fuck.
We can make salsa ya know, maybe even some hot sauce. That doesn't mean we're married.
ashley and jimmy are about to have sex on degrassi.... EVERYONES GETTING LAID BUT ME
She helped me organize my comics and then blew me. This is the one.
About to see some guy and give him a glance that tries to express how sorry i am for blowing his friend while he was getting a BJ in the same room
Cats found the secret coke stash again
They owe us $80.
i'm soo broke, the only trip i can afford for spring break is acid
So I craigslisted sugar daddies and I'm pretty sure I found us one if you can pretend to be asian.
You told me to remind you that the bruise on your ass is from when you danced on the table at Ziggy's, saw a cop and tried to 'fly away'.
I find it ironic...the gays are dying to get married & I just want a fucking divorce
I'd just like to formally thank you for the size of your dick. The gods must really love you.
Is there a polite/non-lush way to ask how alcohol ranks on their list of priorities? Because like idk how to break the ice furreal.
Don't drag this out. All I need to know is if I have to put pants on or not.
I swear my vagina needs to be taken away from me when I drink.
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