FUCK YOU CALIFORNIA. YOU DO NOTHING RIGHT. FIRST PROP 8 AND NOW THIS.
Srsly this has gone to far. Just broke my nose on the toilet. College bars.
I was getting sick from all the peanut butter I had to lick off
Stop bitching. YOU SHOULD FEEL BLESSED TO HAVE LICKED PEANUT BUTTER OFF OF THESE TOTTERS
IM A SHIT SUOW THE GUYS AT THE PMACR TOLD ME AJDBO I WEBF RO WALNARY WITH OU SHOES! I WASHT LLOWES FLOWERSA
First roommate to find me and dance with me will live. Battle Royale.
He said bring my breathalyzer and Anna's pepper spray, I didn't ask questions
Note to self...boner negates all verbal agreements ...got it
No my first time having an orgasm with you will not be on face time
Also bring a pizza or no entry to my vagina OR the fort.
Cheese only
Sloppy and selfish. Your 27 and you don't know where my clit is? BYEEE
I made the last cup in beer pong off the dude's hat. I also faintly remember rapping Forever by Drake during said game.
I'm excited for him and his new girlfriend. I'm just going to miss his penis is what I'm saying.
Hiking for a first date sounded like a good idea in theory because there was absolutely no possibility of me blacking out. In practice, I'd rather black out than go through what I just went through.
Everything isn’t always sunshine & rainbows. Sometimes there’s tequila.
I had a good weekend too...although I cried about the dog in a drunken stupor last night...not one of my finest moments, but it's all water under the bridge.
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