Call me at 7:30 and make sure I'm not asleep in this booth at Waffle House.
Instead of just putting in it he asked "will you do the honors?" it was the cutest thing I had ever heard before sex.
Instead of centeral air we are getting a margaritaville machine. Thought you would enjoy our logic
She talked about nothing but beanie babies for 45 minutes. I'm never getting high with her again.
but he gave me mouthwash after the bj. no ones ever done that for me before.
don't mind me. just hanging out in this cool air conditioned Babies R Us until the liquor store next door opens.
The Mole People would help. They are a kind, helpful people, the Mole People are.
Mole people?
Mole people
Took three klonopin and turned all my jeans into jorts. I miss you
I think I fell in love with her when I saw her kick a freshman in the chest
It happened to me once. But i washed off in a duck pond and walked home naked.
I hope you get your threesome on vday. I'll probably get flowers and a candlelit dinner. trade you. I wish this guy was more of a slut and had less of a heart. I would like 2 dicks please fuck your flowers!
This bird just went for my eyes. Does he think I'm dead???
Looks like I'm not in the Ashly Madison files. But my wife is.
what the fuck happened to the tacos
I just want a man in my bed on a regular basis, who cuddles, and who I can also occasionally hang out with outside of my bedroom. Is that too much to ask for?
Randomize
