she was drooling, sharted in her sleep, rolled over stuck her hand under the covers pulled it back out, smelled it and moaned and rolled back over. i almost added puke to the disgusting bodily fluid category.
I GOT EATEN OUT IN A MERCEDES ON A TUESDAY NIGHT. I EARNED THIS SHIT.
Listen, I'm 30. If it doesnt involve a super soaker and some chicken wings, you can count me out.
She had her underwear around her neck. No one can tell me i'm a slut now.
It sounds like heaven mixed with world peace and orgasms. The acoustics in this car are awesome. Or it's the weed idk either way it's great
You may genuinely find a use for the siphon. But the bag of human hair is less likely.
She didn't need to know her brother was thrown out of a bar for getting head on the dance floor. You're a shit head.
My wife climbed on top of me, fucked my brains out, and gave me money from the ATM. I'm living the dream.
I deserve to be covered in dicks
I've discovered my ability to crush a man's ego is greater than my hate for beer.
I am so sorry for drunk texting you r kelly lyrics
Need to find a Santa hat to fit my penis, he deserves to be festive too.
Her son walked in on us and asked if he could "wrestle too."
I was so close to going to get my nipples pierced with my mom today
My penis definitely considers my Captain Cock costume a success
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