I love watching others lives come down to our level.
Stripper fight on main stage. It just happened. And it was glorious.
So my teacher figured out I made a drinking game out of her lecture. Once my drink was gone she let us out. Happy St. Patricks day class. Your welcome
You would ignore him even if it wasn't NoManUary. It could be the Winter of a Thousand Dicks and you wouldn't talk to that guy.
The Winter of A Thousand Dicks sounds terrifying!!!
Well, I found my bra. It's in my glove compartment with a half-eaten Snickers bar and a Jesus bookmark.
I had to make out with him. He bought me a few drinks and he was an Angels fan. As a Yankee fan that was my way of saying good game and sorry we beat the shit out of you
What's great about college is that i can eat chocolate cereal for every meal and call it a money saving technique.
No more going to class sober.. Tried it for a day or two, its just not for me
I threw up through my nose tonight. Happy cinco de mayo
WE HAD GREAT SEX AND I HATE MYSELF FOR IT
MDMA IS GREAT AND YOU WERE THE WORST GIRLFRIEND EVER.
Turns out he's actually a she. Might keep dating her just to see Mom's reaction.
I've pulled 4 ticks off of me. This is the last time I suck dick in the wild.
He went down on me while I was on the phone with my grandma.
All I remember was my mom walking through the door, and then me asking her if she wanted a hit.
Randomize
