Luol and I just scored with two 40 year old married chicks. They dropped us off on the way to soccer prctic. The kids in the back were confused. Call me.
Holy fuck. She looks like Vin Diesel's stuntman
So I was gonna stay in tonight but the president got me motivated! I will not quit. Bars here I come.
I guess you can say it's a tradition... whoever brings home the ugliest guy has to do all the cleaning the next day
Dignity is for republicans.
I'm eating tomato paste and drinking banana juice that is expired. Can we please get groceries tonight?
P.S, i don't recommend doing keg stands on top of vehicles.
they were having sex on the toilet apparently and everytime someone knocked they flushed. it was like an auditory scoreboard of sex duration.
So. I need to gloat. I couldn't exactly tell my family that I won this game by deep throating.
How can I politely yet provocatively ask you for a cock shot?
i dont remember how or why, but i now have 3 coupons for a free BJ from Anise stapled to my right arm.
His last name was woodcox? That just screams I've got a great penis
Matched with the lumberjack. Here's your wedding invite.
Apparently swingers are magnetically drawn to me?
Plus you need some new dick in your life, the environment is fucked enough you don’t have to recycle anymore 😂💀
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