Exactly. All of us sinners go to hell and get nothing while all of the goody two shoes get to go to heaven where its all pink floyd, lasers, and pot.
This should be a warning to men everywhere: do not send pictures of your erect penis to women you hardly know - they will add cats and send them to all of their friends.
I feel like a cloud. A cloud that wants to be laid.
I even got my dealer to make gluten free special cookies ;-)
that's where you went wrong. never assume I'm adult enough to do something on my own.
So wait. Let me get this straight lol... you... are are considering offering fetish services to "trample and own" someone for $80 in order to pay for someone to come organize ur shit? Pure genius.
Sometimes I think he has a hidden camera in my vagina so he knows what I'm doing and saying at all times...
Who brings nunchucks to a funeral?
You should feel special! You're also the only person I've ever punched during sex
the insurance claim form from last night says foreign object removal from genitourinary tract so as far as the insurance company knows, it could have been a gerbil
At what point in a new hookup do you tell the guy you need to wear a mouth guard when you sleepover because of your TMJ? Asking for a friend.
he’s basically the devil with a fuck boy hair cut and chlamydia
Please tell me that nice older woman you're with at the bar is not your comp&lit professor.
you drug him to get him horny then deny him sex. freaks.
just got back. in my inebriated state i broke an ugly lamp and was sent to the store (still drunk) to get a new one. just spent last half hour in isle 3 of dollar general surounded by more ugly lamps and trying not to throw up on each and every single one.
Randomize
