I don't care if the man pisses on teenage girls, he's enchanting.
im probably shirtless right now with a bottle of jack watching horton hears a who. this is a judgement free zone.
I am soup sandwich. I have been at dAnce party
I ended up on the roof were calling it a tie
ur roommate just sent me a pic of us fucking. i'm not coming over anymore.
I refuse to apologize. Any dick that comes that close to my face uninvited is gonna get bit
I just woke up entirely naked on top of a pile of some guy's laundry on his bedroom floor.
Also, horsecock action starts in about a month. Have you prepared yourself yet?
you strike me as the kind of person who when they spill something on their lap they take off their pants and eat it anyways. right off the crotch seam.
I could teach a class on "expressing your thanks through photos taken of yourself in the shower"
You must be buzzed on Miller Lite.. Zen master advice is flowing
I just chugged whiskey at 7 AM because going to breakfasts at Brendas doesnt seem right if Im not real drunk. I feel like when Brenda takes my order she can tell Im drunk and will take care of me.
I have commenced my lesbian college experimentation. Wish me luck
I am so horny. It's like all the stress of finals week has relocated to my vagina.
Hey man, he's too drunk to remember what you said. What drugs are we buying and when should we expect them?
Randomize
