I think your x's eyes are broken his new girl is so hit
About to do something stupid. You'll be my call. Bring bail money.
Apparently they shut down a cook out cause people were selling drugsout the drive thru. Nice to be home
It was like his mom forgot to breastfeed him and he was making up for lost time.
i just peed in a port a potty and wiped with my credit card statement. fuck yeah!
I am sleeping on the floor in your room so if you have sex in here just don't roll on me
haha you were so trashed that you deleted all of your christian music from itunes and kept saying"c-ya God, nice knowin ya"
Fuck him. I'll set him on fire for you. Then we'll see how good of a firefighter he is.
They have an open bar at this baby shower. I was born to be Cuban.
she's a gynecology student. i don't know if my dick's ready for that kind of pressure.
I can't believe we had "50th anniversary of man in space" sex.
A kid in my class brought a George Foreman and cooked food mid lecture. When the prof found out, all the kid did was ask if he wanted some.
siamese drinking twins saturday is a go ... bring duct tape.
He wins the giant teddy bear for getting the neuva ring on the dick
woke up to two girls crawling on top of me forcefeeding me bacon. Best. Hangover. Ever.
Randomize
