i don't know how boys match. i think shoes & belt are the only thing. it doesn't matter. i just know if they look stupid.
she just fell off the couch. onto a bag of pretzels. her face resembled a cat that just swallowed a sock.
Say something about gay babies.
it's a girl!!
That's great, I look forward to meeting her in 18 years
Is it a bad thing that the only time i wear nice clothes to class, is when i get too fucked up the night before and wear the same clothes i went out in?
i stalked him back to the creation of his facebook in november 2008. that bad.
if we break up, blackout me is coming back, making out with everything in sight
There was no way out of it, seeing as I left my photo ID right next to the vomit.
Ohh god. I'm so nervous. This is terrible. He just introduced me as "the best girlfriend of his life" and Jenny as his "sexual roomate"
I'm sorry I dragged a dildo (on a leash) into your room last night.
Apparently the cops have a video of me singing bob seger "Night moves".
It's not like I ment to feed you the shots of vodka, my hand just kinda slipped.
how am i in montreal? thats like a 3 hour train ride. i remember nothing.
90% sure I just opened a snapchat of you in a fuzzy bathrobe next to your ceiling collapsing
Your dick is the only reason I have motivation to come back to school today
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