Trimmed my pubes and broke your paper shredder. Separate events.
Is pulling weed out of a vagina a good thing or a bad thing?
i need a lesbian romance or unplanned pregnancy for some spicein my life.
is it bad that i have made the decision to never travel to vienna simply because of that transvestite that won the bachelor?
dont start drinking without me
they bet me shots that I couldn't give people piggyback rides around the club just cause I'm 125lbs and a girl...I had a line forming after the third guy.
They just asked a fat guy to move to the other side of the plane. Send me a pic of your tits incase we crash
There was blow residue on my chem book and my TA was like, did u stain your notebook with CaCO3?
I got a message from the hook up gods today that it's time to move on. It came in the form of me being shoved in a closet naked and stuck in there for 30 min well he watched boy meets world with his brother.
IF IT WALKS LIKE A MANWHORE AND QUACKS LIKE A MANWHORE, HE PROBABLY HAS VD.
She's impossible to please. Other than with two fingers and a tongue.
I quit life. I got pulled over on my way to work and they towed my car and dropped me off at work in a cop car
You can't just walk around stealing hats from drunk boys and peeing in bathtubs. Turn down.
My dad found my bra hanging from my rear view mirror. Happy long weekend.
I hope April is a better month for dicks. March has been very disappointing.
He is married, and has a regrettably large penis. I need to find another one right away to get myself out of this mess.
How big does a penis have to be before it becomes regrettably so?
Randomize
