yo I wanna see you, bring that beard of yours
he thought he was parachuting out of a plane... talk about a bad trip.
my cup is half full, half full of rum.
yep. it's official. for $40 they will let you lick the stripper pole.
If you value my life, if you value your own, please look for that godforsaken cookie. Please.
i'm half naked talking to a cat. you don't have to justify your life to me.
Imagine if you could have something so delicious, like your taste buds went on LSD while eating a chocolate tiramisu. That's the opposite of what cum tastes like.
The best part about living in a college town is the annual rush of senior girls who want to get in their lesbian experiment before they graduate.
A kid in my class today just asked if we have class on the 17th, then announced that he couldn't go anyways because it was the day after his 21 and he was going to be too hungover
Im like a hedgehog. Easy to corner or get within reach, but tough to get right close to. Like a rooster with its feathers surgically replaced with razors
You popped the Plan B pill then clapped twice, said "mischief managed" and headed tward the bar.
It's cool dude. The dank is in the form of premade smores with honey grahm crackers, marshmallow cream and 420 brand choc. bars. NV weed laws have nothing on me.
also, when i showed up he started talking to me and eventually asked me if the girls treated me well. i went on to talk about my sex life. he was talking about his secretaries.
He made me promise not to describe his penis in detail to you....oops.
I thought I was drunk because I kept grabbing his arm instead of his dick
But then I realized it wasn’t his arm and that I was very lucky
Randomize
