the third sister isn't as attractive as the other two but I will do her anyway to finally pull off the fabled family hat trick.
I texted her sayin "I gotta brush my teethn then Im omw" maybe hint to do the same
I havent dry-humped that much since freshmen year. Forgot how good it doesnt feel.
So the "just a friend" kid confessed his love for me...sometimes I hate how awesome I am.
She didn't know my name but she knew I was Canadian so she just called me Canada. It sounded like the national anthem when we were fucking.
The fact that its 530pm and I'm saying to myself I should sober up since I'm at a family establishment should say enough
I did the walk of shame wearing his scrubs. Fucking med school students is the way to go.
Now I get the fucking shakes every time I hear I'm Sexy And I Know It. Thanks, Captain Morgan.
I think my Halloween costume this year will be made entirely of pillows and I'll be Marshmellow girl or Kirby. That way I'm comfortable, warm, and if I fall over drunk I'm safe.
If I win the contest of drinking the most water I get a chicken nugget.
I take to many stalker pics of him. If he ever looks through my phone he'll never give me sex again :(
He literally said I should watch game of thrones while I was blowing him like is this the conversation you want to be having right now
I straight up told your dad I've slept with a majority of your family
At least your nickname is not Plunge Slut and that nickname is not in a published thesis work
I don't see why I have to pay for it.
your head went through the window, you're pretty much obligated to pay for it.
Randomize
