I've come to the conclusion that as a grad student I would much rather prefer to get laid then get drunk
I think you know full well that a few years ago my stance was the polar opposite
I guess I should mention that I have already fucked the Fed Ex guy.
That changes everything.
Also just realized how inappropriate it looks to other drivers to finish bottles of cheap champagne at stoplights
Of course, I believed he would find me irrestible...sloppy drunk, chugging from a bottle of chardonnay, and completely naked because those kids stole my clothes as I was swimming on their private beach
she kept calling me pablo. i just went with it.
I'm pretty sure this is how polyamorous relationships begin.
You should get a handy in the street again, just to prove you've still got it.
Its 6 am and me and the girl in the next apartment have been taking turns puking and yelling "never agaaaain" thru the walls.
You said your face felt like it was made out out of boxes and kept asking me to give you a bath.
I feel like on the last day of finals we should run around campus dressed like Moses screaming "LET MY PEOPLE GO!!!!"
I'll start the recruiting
I don't remember anything after falling in the ditch, but I now have confirmation that my rib is broken. Never drinking again.
I mean it could have been worse, I could have been sober.
I can't go to the bars anymore. She wanted to see me again and I drunkenly told her I was moving today. If she spots me I'm fucked.
I have never been that aroused while laughing my ass off in my life
Nows a good time to tell him. Just be like "yeah, I used to bang her too and it didn't work out for us either". He'll understand.
Randomize
