Well how sick are u. Ive got a good immune system.
whoever created level 16 on brickbreaker is a dick
You woke up in the middle of the night and told me we won the sweepstakes, the penis sweepstakes.
I'm sorry, but the way we fuck, they don't make condoms strong enough not to break
They thought we spoke German and French even though we just kept repeating "I give to you a cat" and "Are you drunk?"
I'm gonna need a helmet and adult supervision by 9...
Walked in on my boss having phone sex at work... and somehow this didnt bother nor embaress him
The liquor store manager told us to drink responsible as we checked out and we laughed to his face. Like we're buying karkov at noon, responsibility is out of the question
We made a bong out of a plastic football. I can honestly say we make a good team.
I deem it safe for us to drink together again.
They dropped the charges?
Yeppers. Come drink beers.
It's ok, I may have just peed outside your car and used your whataburger napkins. Hope you weren't saving them for a special occasion.
Let's just say after this weekend I'm known as Shameous the Irish bar fighter.
I found a used condom in my purse this morning. It was in there with a bunch of smushed french fries.
Full body rubs, head scratches, foot rubs, massages, a penis that is able to get hard whenever you want it. I mean ive got a lot to offer
Where are you? Where am I? Why am I so red?
Randomize
